I moved to Leyawiin, in Oblivion. Bought a house. It’s a rat-trap. I keep it dark because any candle could burn the whole place down. Most nights, I sit and wait for television to be invented, but sometimes I wander about. I made the clothes of everyone at a swank dinner party disappear. That was pretty funny. Laughed all the way to jail for that one. I think the Countess may someday forgive me, but I’m not holding my breath.
I patched things up with the Count by taking me and my orc friend Mazoga off to bump tusks with Black Brugo. The Count was so happy to find him dead that he made us Knights-Errant of the White Stallion, with a shield and everything (but no white stallion to ride…). He also gave us keys to the exclusive, posh estate outside of town, the White Stallion Lodge.
When I got there, the ‘guys’ were kinda shocked to see I was a girl. Well, they got over that pretty quick… and I decided to wait for Mazoga to show up… outside… we’ll go get some black bows for the Count, but no way I’m going in that lodge again.
Floors are sticky. And I don’t want to know from what.