Weekly Foundry Reviews for March 1, 2015
I apologize for being late with these reviews; Kasul works late and I couldn’t stay up late enough to finish what we’d chosen. What with one thing and another, we didn’t finish them until Saturday. Which was too bad, because on Saturday, we played one of the funniest foundry quests we’d ever played…
But first…
The Eye in the Sky by @jeremieuserx2
The Queen Lizard Overlord, Beyoncé, is in low Neverwinter orbit, and in league with Wal-Mart and the US Government, is sending her forces against the sadistic evil of Ron Paul and Hillary Clinton… or something. Also, Monsanto and the Queen of England. Was a little confused.
There were bunches of encounters, but they were easily avoided. Kasul and I rode past them, through the portal, and then skipped the final fight as well.
No fighting, elapsed time about two minutes, most of which was trying to figure out what the heck was up with this “quest”.
I rated it one star. Kasul declined to help it escape the “For Review” tab by rating it. If you liked this quest, you must be the author.
Pros: This is what mental illness looks like.
Cons: This is what mental illness looks like.
A Cold, Dark Place by @lionhaert777
You overhear a couple guards talking about a potential adventure opportunity. “Sergeant Knox has no more men to spare for Coldsnap Pass,” one guard guffawed, as guards well. “Though, Guard Frinko has been set to the task of recruiting such as will fight for coin.”
Well, Neverwinter is sick with adventuring and mercenary companies. There’s groups of killers available for hire behind every door of the city, and more than one behind some. Nonetheless, perhaps there’s something about this “Coldsnap Pass” that makes the risk beyond what any sane organization would touch.
Nobody ever called us sane…
We soon met up with a ghoulish sort of man that made his coin looting the previous adventurers who had shown up looking for treasure and had found only their deaths. We scoffed at that, and met up with a Doomguard at a camp that was being attacked by undead. We let them kill off the undead that attacked (I think Kasul accidentally helped on one wave). The Doomguard sent us off into a dungeon to find the true source of the evil, a man whose grief drove him to necromancy. Naturally, the Doomguard couldn’t help us inside because reasons.
Fairly strong characters and a decent, if unexciting, story made up for the rather dull maps and a lot, a LOT, of running back and forth. Probably best to just turn off that lying sparkly path. Kasul and I both gave it three stars.
If you liked this quest, you might enjoy “Crossroads to Adventure” by @Longshire.
Pros: Good characters, a surprisingly dark plot.
Cons: Boring maps.
Act I: Centurion by @gormenghast
I mentioned how many mercenary and adventuring companies made their homes in Neverwinter? In this quest, one of them — Legion Invicta — is recruiting. You and your fellow recruits must compete to win a place in the company, and then prove your worth on the battlefield.
If you’ve ever taken part in a job interview, the first bit of this quest will seem eerily familiar to you. Once you’ve successfully given your blood sample, answered the trick questions, and learned the oath, you’re paired with a fellow trainee and sent out with an experienced officer — but all too suddenly, it falls to you and your partner to save the day.
The word choices in this quest were… creative. “Isn’t there any training period anterior to active service?” “It’s vital to circumscribe the losses!” Also, the word “recruitment” was spelled in at least four different ways, which was odd, considering this is the very essence of the quest.
For all that, the characters were good. We’ve been recruited into organizations before, but this one was the one that most felt like sitting at a table, filling out forms. So, the most realistic.
I gave it three stars. I don’t know how Kasul ranked it. If you enjoyed this quest, you may also enjoy “Harrowing Hildbrant” by @HellsHot.
Pros: Decent characters, and a decent plot, if you could wade through the language
Cons: Terrible spelling, unconventional word choices. Someone had fun with a thesaurus.
Jarpig Abridged by @ryzelmine
If you’ve ever thought longingly back for those old Super Nintendo Japanese RPGs, and thought, “why can’t we ever go back to those days of simple characters, simple plots, simple destinies, and knowing silences?”, well, this is the quest for which you’ve been waiting.
“Jarpig Abridged” takes every hoary old JRPG cliché and smashes it with a stick until it yells. I could go on and on, but I really don’t want to spoil anything. It’s a quest which really must be experienced.
The maps were decent enough, as were the encounters, though neither are really the point of this quest. The story is… well, again, just play it. It’s in the “For Review” tab, where it’s apparently sat since last May, but don’t let that stop you from seeking it out. Four stars from both Kasul and I.
Pros: Hilarious
Cons: May actually die laughing.
A1-The Apprentice by @HellsHot
Adventuring is fascinating work, but sometimes you need a break. Your apartment in Neverwinter has everything you need to refresh yourself before you leave on your next job. There’s food, a warm bath, a soft bed, a corpse bleeding out on your rug, a…
Wow. That rug really tied the place together. Ruined, now. Apparently this was a courier with a message for you, or so the Magistrate tells you when you’ve hunted him up. Magical armor has been stolen, the dwarves who made it killed or missing (the apprentice of the title is the last of those), and Neverwinter under threat of attack by Thayans, against whom this armor was to be used.
Solving a murder, returning lost items, saving missing dwarves — all in a day’s work for an adventurer.
This was a good quest. Detailed maps. Took place entirely within Neverwinter, which is unusual. Great story. Good characters. Interesting plot. Spelling and grammar were great. There was no reason not to give this quest five stars, and so we did.
The only reluctance we had was to the story. As the first chapter of a campaign, it’s expected that the plot will only be set up in the first chapter, but there’s nothing that had Kasul and I desperate to see what could possibly come next. “The Apprentice” is a pro-level quest, but not in any way memorable. Even campaign quests should stand on their own.
Pros: Good characters, maps, and plot
Cons: Not really exciting.
Today’s writing music: Evanescence, “Origin”
Permanent link to the ever-growing spreadsheet of reviewed quests: http://goo.gl/XbV9hj
